Ep 20. I Love You But I Don’t Like You: Exploring the Importance of Friendships in Relationship
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In this thought-provoking episode, we tackle the difficult question of defining cheating in a relationship and how to set healthy boundaries. We discuss the concept of monogamy and how it has changed over the past 50-60 years, encouraging listeners to consider monogamy not as something restrictive but as something expansive. Join us as we explore the idea of creating a monogamish relationship, one that respects the values of monogamy while also allowing for emotional investment with others. We challenge you to look at cheating from a place that isn’t based on limits, jealousy, and control.
Listen in as we explore how to create a relationship agreement that works for both partners and how to sustain it over time. We emphasize the importance of communicating expectations and understanding the different definitions of cheating. We also discuss the evolution of relationships as culture changes, and how non-monogamous and polyamorous relationships still require intentional conversations and agreements. Don't miss our insights on the nuances of having conversations around cheating, the importance of setting standards and boundaries, and the need to be honest and vulnerable with ourselves and our partners about our feelings and desires.
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Chapter Summaries: (0:00:08) - Defining Cheating and Creating Monogamish Standards
-We discuss the concept of monogamy and how it has changed over the past 50-60 years.
- We encourage listeners to consider monogamy not as something restrictive but as something expansive, to create a monogamish relationship, one that respects the values of monogamy but also allows for emotional investment with others.
(0:11:49) - Relationship Agreements and Communication
-We explore how to create a relationship agreement that works for both partners, and how to sustain it over time.
- We discuss the evolution of relationships as culture changes, and how non-monogamous and polyamorous relationships still require intentional conversations and agreements.
(0:20:34) - Cheating and Vulnerable Communication in Relationships
-We delve into the nuances of having conversations around cheating and the importance of setting standards and boundaries.- -We discuss the need to be honest and open in order to create trust in a relationship, and the danger of using control to avoid being hurt.
Key Takeaways:
- Communication is key in relationships, especially when discussing boundaries and standards.
- Monogamy can be restrictive, but it can also be expansive when approached as a monogamish relationship.
- Relationship agreements should be co-created and adaptable over time.
- Vulnerable communication is essential for maintaining trust and understanding in a relationship.
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